Why does Tom Petty have to be dead?

I don't mean to be a dick, but I would trade him for Bob Dylan.  I'm not wishing anyone dead; I'm asking for a trade.  I want to be clear on that, that I'm a good, virtuous person who isn't just wishing people dead.

Check out this amazing live Tom Petty song with a special, enchanting guest lady.

This is my favorite Tom Petty song ever.

This is a very close second, and one of the most romantic songs in existence.

So last night around midnight, the smoke detectors start going off.  I'm trying to push buttons and turn them off.  We all know I'm not mechanically inclined.  The sound was hurting my ears and I had no fucking idea what to do at this point.  All I could think was to leave my house or sleep in the car? 

I got some toilet paper and tape and taped the TP over the speaker thingy to quiet it a bit.  Okay.  I texted my neighbor downstairs and she said she had called the fire department.  She is a rational, thinking adult, and not some sort of weird person who lives in her own head and can only think of escaping.  So I'm grateful to have a together neighbor.

The alarm that alerts you that you wake up a hideous beast, the beauty and the beast alarm.

We met up downstairs.  She looked GORGEOUS.  She had on lip gloss, some beautiful fancy robe thing, and fancy sandals.  How does one look so good at midnight?  I had on a baggy Old Navy t-shirt that cost $5 and some pajama bottoms that look like they belong to a poor orphan. 

I don't hate men, of course, but I am so happy that whatever this is exists in the world.